1P Start

…but now Infinity Ward is just trying to fuck with us. Last night I showed you all their pretty clever Kim Jong Il review of Call of Duty 4. I liked it. Many thought it was six degrees of “meh”. Now, however… they’re just trying to scare you.

…I want to drink with Infinity Ward.

Infinity Ward, Call of Duty 4, Modern Warfare

In a move that sent teary-eyed women running into the arms of their man, Konami announced today that Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots has been delayed. While this news is indeed most unfortunate, what this will spawn is even more disheartening.

Namely, the “MGS4 coming to Xbox 360” rumors will almost assuredly be revived, as fanboys pick apart the press release looking for hidden messages. I swear, when you fanboys want something to hang your hat on, you’ll pick apart a press release with the bravado and thoroughness of a Nostradamous follower. It’s almost a shame that you’re wasting this gift on video games.

That press release can be read after the break. MGS4, however, won’t be here until Q2 2008.

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Capcom and Sony have partnered up to create and release a Full-Length CG movie based on the Resident Evil franchise. The film, entitled “BIOHAZARD: Degeneration” (and almost assuredly will be called “Resident Evil: Degeneration” should it come stateside) will be an entirely Computer-Generated entry into the Resident Evil franchise that will introduce us all to a brand new storyline.

While no details of the story have been revealed, Capcom has stated that the production should be ready for release sometime in 2008. Huzzah!

Full Press Release after the break.

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From what I can make out from the badly-translated article from Xbox 360 Only (only?), it appears that top Cow kinda, sorta accidentally let slip that Starbreeze was working on a sequel to the game based off of the excellent comic series.

The error apparently came from someone at top Cow Comics, who let slip in an e-mail (and I apologize for AltaVista):

And yes, The Darkness game will property a sequel. It may be late 2008 or 2009!

…if my interpretation of English is anywhere NEAR where I hope, I think what this employee said was that we can expect The Darkness 2, a direct sequel to the original, in late ‘08/early ‘09… I think. The site that broke this story is in Dutch, so I’m doing what I can here.

Either way, if true, I am psyched. When I heard about the first Darkness game, I was very happy. It’s not often you see lesser-known comic licenses get turned into games or films (exception being ‘A History of Violence’), and I hope it’s something more studios think about in the future.

[Xbox 360 Only] (It’s in Dutch)

Starbreeze Studios, The Darkness

See that rather impressive image? That is the new box art for Burnout Paradise, the next entry in the long running series that has been EA’s only truly great product for the past three years.

It should be noted that, as you can see by the 3+ marking in the lower left corner, that this is the European box art. This isn’t an uncommon thing to see with games. Many games coming to the US from Japan, for instance, have drastically different art styles than games going from, say, Japan to Europe. It’s all marketing.

…but that is some pretty awesome box art…

Burnout Paradise, Electronic Arts, PlayStation 3, Xbox 360

Yahtzee is back, this time dissing both America and Democracy as he reviews the latest entry in the long-running, long-worn out Medal of Honor series, Medal of Honor: Airborne. His basic complaints are actually quite valid, and his poking and jabbing at the US penchant for over-patriotism is second-to-none. Watch it, love it, and respect it.

Communist.

Electronic Arts, Medal of Honor, Airborne, Yahtzee, Escapist Magazine, Zero Punctuation

Other than Animal Crossing and their oh so fun special nights I enjoyed on the GameCube long ago (ah, resetting the time/date on a console has never been so useful), I can’t think of many games that put something special in with certain dates (NOTE: I know there was one, I think I Dreamcast, was it Nights? I know Animal Crossing wasn’t the first game to do it, damn memory!).

Bungie has now joined in on the festivities. Today and today only, a new “Halloween” section has popped up in matchmaking with the game type known as “Zombies” or now titled as “Infected” in the custom games, but to ensure confusing times for gamers, they have it listed as “Living Dead.” Before typing this up, I jumped into two games to test out my skills, and I was on fire (Proof!), I felt like the toughest level 1 on earth.

There is a few versions of Zombies available, all with the basic concept of Zombies vs Humans. Zombies have swords, humans have weapons. After a zombie kills you as a human, you turn into a zombie, the game ends when all humans are dead or time runs out (never happens). Maps were tweaked in Forge to make them feel a little different than usual, I personally played High Ground twice, where basically the level looked as though it was littered with trash, other than that, no huge difference. Enough reading about it, get online and get to kicking ass for this once in a lifetime playlist (until they do it again, which will happen), offer good till 3am, so there is still time to get all your trick or treating in before getting online, woo!

[Bungie]

I don’t know if there would have been a better way to title Gamepro’s latest feature, “27 Ways to Save the Consoles” as they have named it, or “Holy Sh#t, GamePro Wrote Something Worth Viewing!” Either way, I have to give some sort of kudos to them for being able to put something on their site that not only isn’t complete crap, but also provides a way to console bash the big three at the same time in a very constructive way (don’t worry, last gen and handhelds are covered too).

Full list after the break, check GamePro.com for their full reasons, however, I think you can get the jist from titles alone. Have fun taking these onto forums to talk about why “THE BS3 SUX0rz” and the “Nintendo is for kids and ports!”:

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This is the newest advertisement for the upcoming Game of the Year nominee, Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare. While I do find the idea of Kim Jong Il reviewing a video game to be rather funny, I have to express concern that by watching this, and showing you all, I may be helping spread the seed that will eventually lead to our nuclear demise.

But at least we’ll have played CoD4 by then.

Activision, Infinity Ward, Call of Duty 4

Xbox360Achievements has revealed the achievements list for the upcoming FPS that is sure to further rape my childhood, BlackSite: Area 51. There are 44 achievements in total, equalling the ever-familiar 1000 points.

In addition to getting points for beating each stage, as well as beating the game on each difficulty, you have some skill-based achievements as well. 25 points for capturing 25 flags, and 100 points for 400 kills with each weapon will keep achievement whores coming back for more.

I’m curious about this one, honestly. As someone who wasted his childhood playing the Arcade classic, I wanna see what they do with my favorite franchise.

[Xbox360Achievements]

Microsoft, Xbox 360, BlackSite: Area 51

It’s certainly possible, if you believe Assassin’s Creed director Jade Raymond. In an interview with German website Gamers-Spirit, Raymond did say that it would be possible to make a Wii port of Assassin’s Creed. However, because of the Wii’s unique characteristics (or as I call them, gimmicks), Ubisoft would have to completely change the gameplay mechanics to make the game work on the platform.

[A Wii port] would be possible, but would require a complete gameplay change, like the DS version. But it would not be the same game experience. Unfortunately, it has just not nearly the same performance as the PS3 and the 360.

So, Nintendo Nation, there you go. Assassin’s Creed on the Wii? Possible. But not very likely.

[Gamers-Spirit]

Ubisoft, Assassin’s Creed, Jade Raymond, Microsoft, Xbox 360, Sony, PlayStation 3, Nintendo, Wii

Are you on the fence about getting a PlayStation 3, but really don’t want to get it in the default chromed black? Do you have a pile of money that you’ve been thinking about setting on fire? Well, thanks to a company called XSS Corporation, you could get your hands on one of several multi-colored PlayStation 3s.

There are five colors currently available for bidding on eBay: Yellow, Red, Sky Blue, Pink, and Green. The starting bids for each are $999.99.

Look, I am not going to sit here and tell you how to spend your money. You earned it, and you can spend it however you wish. But if you wind up buying one of these, I fear your family will be ashamed for twelve generations.

Dumb shit.

Sony, PlayStation 3, XSS Corporation

See what I did there? How I made the pun? …yeah, it sucked. I get it. I’m trying here, okay? Either way, unlike my pun the new Resident Evil game looks to be lacking in the suck department. These new videos show off just how infused with the essence of awesome this game is.

There are five videos in all. The final four show off gameplay footage, while the first (seen below) is the intro to the game, with a VO by everyone’s favorite Corey Hart posterboy, Albert Wesker.

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Dortios has announced their five finalists for the “Unlock Xbox” contest. If you don’t know what that is, it’s basically a competition where you, the gamer, got to design your own Doritos-themed Xbox LIVE Arcade title, with the winning selection to be put on Xbox LIVE Arcade for everyone to not download. Kind of like Backgammon — I don’t know anyone who owns it. The finalists are…

“Doritos Presents UDS: Ultimate Dodgeball Champions”
“Rythum Racing” (someone should tell them that ‘rhythm’ is spelled wrong)
“PB’s Quest for Flavor”
“Doritos Dash of Destruction”
“Monkey’s From Mt. Doritos”

Visit the Unlock Xbox website to play the demos… you would think they have these demos on, say, Xbox LIVE… but whatever.

Doritos, Xbox 360, Xbox LIVE Arcade

Guitar Hero III and The Simpsons Game, if you aren’t getting one, you should get the other, hitting all three big systems this week. Though I am going to wait on Rock Band myself (I want those drums), Guitar Hero III is here now, and has a great line up of songs itself. The Simpsons Game might possibly be *the* Simpsons game to own, looking like a perfect mixture of comedy and gameplay, however, with the track record of past Simpson games, it may be best to keep an eye on Metacritic before making a full on dive into buying it.

Some other notable things this week, Manhunt 2 makes its way onto Wii, I might give this a rent, though never into the series, the fuss it has caused makes me curious as to the content. Virtual Fighter 5, the first good fighting game on the 360, I am still waiting on Soul Calibur, but for now, VF5 looks like a “definite rent.” PC games seem to reach into every single genre, even fashion designing. PS3 gets a hold of Stranglehold finally, and… well, time to just check the full list after the break:

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